Dame Chockalot, 2008-02-05**

This story is a real departure from her usual mode. It sounds like it's from Enid Blyton, except that it isn't. She was pretending to read this from the novel I am currently reading. Nothing to do with her story of course.

Listen to her tell this story HERE.

Dame Chockalot.

Once upon a time there was an old beggar called Dame Chockalot, because she had a chocolate face and didn’t like to eat. She was a greedy old woman and didn’t like anyone to go in her store.

She always had an old beggar who asked for a little chair, but she didn’t give him one, so he became very sad and left her shop.

This Dame Chockalot had a beautiful girl called Goldie. Goldie always liked to play, but her mother Chockalot didn’t. Now what I was discussing for you is Dame Chockalot’s friend, Stashamom was singing a very nasty song, “To feash (12 times).” Now Dame Chockalot didn’t like this, but, “The deach (5 times),” had some.

Goldie... Goldie always liked to sing songs.

(Comes to the only page in my book that has an illustration, of a town, and launches into some explanations...)

Now Hook is over here and Haas and his friend Hash lives over here. So Hook lives here, and Hoon lives here. And Hap and Maam lives here.

Chapter One. (Reading this from the book).

There was a Dame Chockalot. Once upon a time Haas lived with a Dame Chockalot. And they lived in a big nasty house that always talks. “Grandmother Willow... everyone has a big nasty time with Dame Chockalot, so can you get a good for it?”

“Maybe,” said the mirror at the house. “But maybe later.”

“WHO said later?” said Dame Chockalot angrily. “I wouldn’t listen to you much longer!” And she stomped off, without getting a word. Away she went, down in the toilet. “Just never mind,” she said, banging the door hard. Then they were on the house. “I don’t want to listen to you much longer.” She stamped her feet off.

Poor Dame Chockalot! How embarrassing she was, without getting the mirror on.

"Poor Dame Chockalot. She hasn’t any time!” said Goldie.

“Alright,” said Dame Chockalot’s friend that was already cooking, because Dame Chockalot asked her to cook, the very evening.

She took out her hand singing Nearer to the Whips and throwed Maleficent into the air like a lightning bolt (chuckling). And suddenly Maleficent hit the island like a big gas(?).

“Oh no!” said Chockalot’s friend. “That couldn’t be.”

Goldie laughed wickedly, a horrible laugh. “(Sniggering) You cannot get me.” She ran off, with a toy that belonged to Dame Chockalot.

“Oh!” said Dame Chockalot’s friend. “I’d better catch you!” But she didn’t. She couldn’t. (Chuckling) Goldie was going everywhere.

Hoon heard a sound and rushed in to Goldie’s friend. “I’ll get a mountain(?) for you,” he said. “It’s over here.” He got it.

Dame Chockalot will say when you got it and never... and forgot to put it back.

“Well, well,” said Dame Chockalot. “Where’s that toy? Cook... Hoon took it without permission, and he forgot to put it on the table (gasps),” said Dame Chockalot angrily. “I will go into his house and steal it!”

“That’s a very bad thing to do, if you do that!” cried Dame Chockalot’s friend.

She stamped her feet very hard, that the teapot crashed to the ground like a big big Muggle toy! She ran off stamping, in her horrible voice, she stamped and stamped her feet hard on the door. She stamped off. “I wouldn’t listen to you much longer,” she said. She stamped her feet.

Dame Chockalot’s friend (To me: mummy can I put the dog ear? Me: Ok, but why? B: Because I need to check who else published the book. Someone published the book... have Dame Thimble mummy.... Dame Thimble mummy published the book. Dame Thimble!)

The dogs and... came out like a big lightning bolt. She stomped a thing without asking permission. She took the marmalade out in the wood, and when Hoon was gone out to get the marmalade it wasn’t there. “(Semi wails) Someone stealed it, it’s actually mine!” he wept.

Suddenly, fire of light stroked the air and the marmalade came back! Dame Chockalot has NEVER stealed it! Dame Chockalot has put it back! And got his marmalade, many on there (?), and said, “Dame Chockalot..”

“Yes?” said Dame Chockalot.

“Do I have a friend? Is she nice?”

“No,” Dame Chockalot said. “So.... I’m not bad, I’m actually good... I was just bad at first. I don’t like being bad, so I became good, in every direction.” She ran down for her marmalade, but it wasn’t there.